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I saw how first dates changed after I started dressing nicer | Date Night Disasters - Talk Freely

I saw how first dates changed after I started dressing nicer

For like two years I was going on first dates in whatever shirt I grabbed off the floor, usually a hoodie and jeans. Then six months ago I started wearing a clean button down and some decent shoes. The difference was crazy, conversations went smoother and girls actually laughed at my jokes. What's the one thing you changed that made dates go better for you?

3 comments

3 Comments

clairem475mo ago

Oh man, "conversations went smoother and girls actually laughed at my jokes" - that's the part that got me. I always thought my jokes were funny, turns out they just couldn't hear me over my wrinkled t-shirt from 2018. I switched from sneakers to actual shoes (not boots, not loafers, just like... normal clean shoes) and suddenly I stopped looking like I was about to run away from the date. The weirdest part is that now when I wear a hoodie to the grocery store, I feel like I'm in disguise or something.

uma6855mo ago

Man you got me thinking now. I used to roll my eyes at that kind of advice, thought it was just people being shallow or whatever. But then I went through this phase where I just started throwing on a collared shirt and clean jeans for regular errands, not even dates, and people started treating me completely different. The guy at the hardware store actually asked if I needed help instead of just pointing at aisles. It's like people see you different when you look like you tried at least a little bit. Makes me wonder how many times I got dismissed for looking like I just rolled out of a crawlspace.

josephl675mo ago

That thing about feeling like you're in disguise hits hard. I had the same realization recently. @uma685 mentioned getting treated different at the hardware store, and now I'm wondering how much of our social problems are just... visual noise? Like people literally cannot process what you're saying if your hoodie has a faded pizza stain on the sleeve. The weirdest experiment I did was wearing a button-down to a comic shop and the clerk actually recommended a "darker, more mature" graphic novel instead of the usual "here's the funny cat comics." It was unsettling but also kind of liberating. Makes me think if I showed up to my own life in clean shoes, would I even recognize the person I become?