The handshake that made me rethink every argument I ever won

I had this buddy Dave from my college days. We were close for about 6 years until a fight over a $40 dinner bill ended it. I thought I was just being honest and direct when I told him he was being cheap. But looking back I was just being a jerk hiding behind honesty. What tipped me off was a handshake with a new coworker last spring. He shook my hand and said "I appreciate your bluntness" but his eyes said something else. That night I realized Dave was probably the same way. He never said it but he got tired of me being right all the time. Has anyone else had a friend go quiet instead of telling you what you were doing wrong?

2 comments

2 Comments

elizabeth90012d agoMost Upvoted

My thirty bucks and I are still on speaking terms though.

abby_black12d ago

Did you ever wonder if Dave started acting differently with other people too? I think sometimes when a friendship ends like that, the quiet friend actually changes how they handle all their relationships going forward. Like maybe Dave started second-guessing himself around everyone because he got so used to you being the one who always had the right answer. That handshake you mentioned is huge because it shows how people will smile and agree while their real feelings are totally different. I had a friend who would just nod and say "okay" when I was being a know-it-all about her job search. Then one day she stopped calling and I found out from her sister that she had been crying about those conversations for months. The quiet ones are usually the ones holding the most hurt, and they just decide its not worth the fight anymore.